Reno John A 00:00
I am totally convinced that God could take away all the pain if he wanted to. He never does that. Like the doctor never does that. He don't want you to forget where you came from. And the pain is there for a reason. Acceptance doesn't change the way you feel. It changes the way you act. That's what happens when you accept something
John M 00:23
Well, hello friends of build via and other friends you have landed on sober speak. My name is John M. I am an alcoholic. And we are glad you're all here, especially newcomers, newcomers that is both to recovery as a whole and newcomers to this podcast. Sober speak is a podcast about recovery centered around the 12 steps of Alcoholics Anonymous. My job here on sober speak is simple. My job is to provide a platform to the amazing stories of recovery all around us. Consider sober speak, if you will, your meeting between meetings. Please remember, we do not speak for a or any 12 Step community. We represent only ourselves. We are here to share our experience, strength and hope with those who wish to come along for the ride. Take what you want, and leave the rest at the curb for the trash man to pick up from Studio A deep in the heart of Texas. That was the voice once again of Mr. Reno. John, the you heard at the beginning of this episode, episode number two to to dos DOS, DOS 222. And you are going to hear so much more from him. Mr. Reno, John in just a moment. But first things first, this episode ray here, Ray NOW is brought to you by Tanya and Cara and Marie and a non white mouse anonymous. What do you what what do you think? Or do away you may ask did Tanya it Cara Marie and anonymous do well they went to our little website, Silver speak.com they clicked on the little yellow donate tab and they made a contribution. So thank you so much, Tanya, ang Cara and Maria and anonymous. This episode is coming right out to humans. I, John M just another Bozo on the bus will indeed be the chairperson for this meeting between meetings and I am truly honored and privileged to serve all of you listening in. So take a seat if you will, around this virtual table. And let's get started. Remember now, four out of five sponsors surveyed recommend sober speak for your mental health and your spiritual well being. What do I have going on this week? Ha number? Well, first of all, I know we're well into the new year but I hope everybody is having a Prospero on yo up to this point. And as my friend Chad in the meeting always says this is the membership drive time for alcoholics anonymous and all the various addictions most likely but anyway, that's halfway funny halfway not funny. But anyway, for those of you who are new to recovery, Alcoholics Anonymous, and the 12 steps overall Al Anon possibly and all the other recovery groups so we welcome you. Remember now no matter what your past looks like, or
John M 04:22
anything else you are welcome here. It is an open table for all and we are glad that you have joined us today. What else do I have? Oh, I have this piece of listener feedback right here at the beginning of the episode. I just loved this feedback that I got earlier this week. Mary Lynn wrote in and she wrote in in regards to episode number 220 is by Rachel ws called a don't leave a before the miracle happens and she said John I Just wanted to let you know, Rachel W's story hit me like a Mack truck. I'm sitting here right now bawling my eyes out in my car. I'm going to send this to all of my sponsees. John, it was absolutely incredible. It's exactly what I needed to hear. Thank you for your service. And once again, Marilyn is talking about episode number 220 with Rachel Debbie. And it's called Don't leave before, don't leave a before the miracle happens. If you haven't heard that one, I will go back a couple episodes from this and listen in it was absolutely fantastic. I was bawling while I was interviewing her really getting caught up in that story. And Rachel, it's just a great story. If you all are out there, and you're listening, and you have any feedback regarding Rachael or any of the other speakers, please send me an email. I love to hear about it. John J. O HN as sober speak calm. I would I would just absolutely love to hear about any of the speakers that you have heard that have impacted you and in what ways? So I for work this week, I had to travel outside of the United States. And because of that travel, I had to go get tested for COVID. And on how did this go on Friday night, I ended up sitting in line for about two, two and a half hours because the testing was going crazy around here. People have to get tested for various reasons such as water, no summer traveling like me. So anyway, there's all kinds of different reasons people are getting tested, right? So I waited in line for about two, two and a half hours, something like that, and finally got it. And then like 24 hours later, on a Saturday night, I found out that the test was inconclusive is what they said. And I'm like, what? I didn't even know this was possible. What do you mean, inconclusive? Just tell me a gada or I don't got it. That's really all I want to know. And I had to leave on Monday for my trip.
John M 07:28
So I raced around all that night trying to find some place that was open, couldn't find any place. And then I went to another place that I had to go to on Sunday. And that line, I say a line it was yeah, it was a line there, you're waiting your car. And that took about three, three and a half hours right in that area. So and then they come back and then they say negative, but they say we're gonna give you a negative test. But that one that says inconclusive, that usually means you're positive. And I would be very concerned, especially since you have been exposed lately and all that kind of stuff. And I was like, So what are you telling me here I'm getting all kinds of mixed messages. And I don't know, the lovely Mrs. M went to the website, and she researched it. And it turned out when they come back the I forget what it was called actually the inconclusive is actually a presumptive positive and so I'm thinking this is a false negative. I've got all these positive negatives, negatives positives, Uncle What is going on here. So finally, I went over to another place that I had to go. Now fortunately, this place was only an hour and a half. So right now I'm in data. Now I'm not adding this i seven, eight hours of sitting in line getting tests waiting for results and all this kind of stuff. And so finally they gave me a test. And they came back later that night and they said it's negative. I said, Hey, I'm going with this one. I'm leaving the country. And oh, my goodness, it was just just crazy. And then when I'm out of the country in order to get back into the United States, I don't know if you are aware of this, but you have to have a another COVID test that says it's been 24 hours now since or within 24 hours of coming back. So the hotel there, they were very accommodating. They had it all set up and you go down into this room. And here's what they tell you, me and a few other people were down there, they they take you into this room, they give you the COVID test. I said now, go back to your room, wait for 20 minutes. And if the phone doesn't ring, you're good to go. But if the phone rings, we're going to tell you to stay in your room and you got COVID and you're going to be stuck here for the next 456 days, however long it may be and I'm not You have got to be kidding me, I just want to get back home. So anyway is interesting when you go back to your room, you just keep looking at that telephone. And you're thinking, please, please, please, please don't ring. Don't ring don't COVID. And that was one of my fears of getting over there is that I was thinking, okay, is this going to be a false negative, and then I get over there. And it actually turns out, I have it and I can't get back into the United States, and I'm going to be stranded out of the country is on like, beta was a nice place. But But still, you know, I just want to get back home. So anyway, I waited the 20 minutes, and there was no ring. And I was thinking, is that it? Should I wait another five minutes? What, three or four minutes? I mean, can I get up and go walk around? What? What is the? You're thinking, Okay, what if they got busy. And then as you're walking around the hotel, and I saw a couple of other people that have been in there, and they go, and I asked him, I go, Well, you're just sitting in the room just looking at that phone the whole time thinking, don't ring the ring, don't worry, just trying to kind of distract yourself. I was doing work and all this kind of stuff. But anyway, I am one of the most tested people in the United States right now, I believe for COVID. So all that went on, and then at the same time in the same week, when I left town on that particular Monday, my daughter my poor daughter, I don't know if you guys remember but I told you
John M 11:29
a couple of weeks ago, a few weeks back now we're like a month right a couple of weeks, three weeks but what are you gonna do now John go into 2020 Just just you know, to slow down here on your weeks but nonetheless, my son had gotten his wisdom teeth taken out and so my daughter got her wisdom teeth taken out on the same day and that's part of the reason I wanted to get back because I wanted to be here with her and you know, say is see how she was doing and we thought okay, first of all, she only had three wisdom teeth the two taken down I don't know where the fourth one went. But I was like, Hey, do I get a discount since it's only three versus four and apparently you do but nonetheless so they took out the three wisdom teeth and they were like little bitty short wisdom teeth and my sons were like, way down in there so we thought our hers is gonna this is gonna be a piece of cake right? Well she is still not doing well looks like and this is like five days later now. She She looks like she has she looks like a a chipmunk like her face is still so swollen it's incredible. And I'm thinking what is she going to come out of this and the pain has not been good and all that kind of stuff but anyway we're getting through it is like coming back into a MASH unit my son is sick too and anyway, such as life but you know what, here's the thing. I I sound probably like I am complaining and I guess I am complaining but I know in my heart of hearts that these are Princess problems if you will. I'm fortunate enough to live in a place where there's all kinds of testing facilities around me and I can get tested pretty much anytime a day or night if I want and and and I know my daughter is going to be okay I know she's in some pain now but we live in an area where we can go and have all this stuff done and you know have them well taken care of and you know, and I got a job that you know can will anyway that is just real good to me and I'm appreciative for everything that I have and so anyway that that that is what's been going on in my in my life here this past week so now on to the episode number 222 here with Reno John live part dose at the beginning of this here Episode You're going to hear Mary Lynn and Tony D sing a recovery song they do an absolutely fantastic job and then we'll get on into the interview with a reno John if you did not hear the episode with Reno John live part one last week you want to go back and listen to not only Reno John's interview, but also the music from Mary Lynn B and Tony de what they did at the beginning of the episode is absolutely fantastic. So now ladies and gentlemen, I present to you without further ado, here is Mr. Reno John at alive at our live event and we will have plenty to listen to listener feedback at the end of this episode, including a voicemail or use.
14:55
So this is this is a song that I wrote. It's called reach and it was inspired by the 12 step right to go out there and reach and be positive and stuff so Tony put his little spin on it so we're gonna do it a little differently then I'm not even gonna make a comment about what I'm not okay all right so this is called reach this will be our last song so let's let's make Tony feel welcome tonight
15:24
yes
15:44
sitting on a park bench Metalab new feeding the birds was left in my bread Savannah Hounsou oh man said excuse me this belongs to you toss me a Shana go comrade Zappa true who told me to try some say he was an angel. Others say it was sad time has passed and seen his face when I'm still filming man sometimes well only few fills my soul Nana little man in the pop right back condo re try a young man seats bad side of the row yes me which way to go and add on the corner see that oh man pass by him savy? This is a we program right here right here. Thank you guys so much. Thank you, John, for letting us do this for your for sober speak and really looking forward to our speaker tonight. So, thank you so much.
John M 18:56
Thank Alright, John. So we talked about this a little bit on the podcast in the past, but can you explain what you believe the differences between spirituality and religion?
Reno John A 19:08
Yeah, well, you know, we're, we're a spiritual program. And a lot of times I think that gets confused. Because I grew up and I was I was really raised in the church. I did four years of seminary, you know, and I think that's the best example I can think of, you know, in, in the Bible, and the carpenters big book that says that it's life eternal, to know God. Now what they mean by life eternal is eternal joy. To know God. So we got to get to know God. And the stories told about three guys at die to go to heaven. Meet St. Peter's in the 38. You got one guy is a Christian, very strong. Christian. one guy's a Jew. He's a Jewish boy. And the other guys are drunk alcohol. So St. Peter says Welcome, we've been waiting for you figured you'd be here about now, decide where you're going to go. You could go here and be interviewed. This gentleman here is going to interview you one at a time. So first got going here, and he'll interview and then he'll direct you to where to go. So guy walks into the room, the Christian goes first walks in the room, walks up a man sitting behind a desk that says, Oh, welcome chat. He said, listen, sit down. It's got just one question. Really? One question want to ask you, okay? He says, Who is God? Because Oh, God, you know, he created the world in six days rest on the seventh day. For men and women, the critters, Adam and Eve ran in the Garden of Eden and then they kicked out a garden, he then and he went through that, and then he had mold. No one had big flood and then Moses came longer term of Israel back to the promise, they went on for an hour. Then he got to the New Testament talked about then he was the son made flesh, and he turned first miracle is turning water to wine. And he went on for another 20 minutes talking about the New Testament. Bill mass is you really know your Bible, is I've been a student of Bible my whole life. He's all great. I'm very proud. We got this door right here. You know, if that door right there, guy goes to the door. Next guy comes is the Jewish man comes over and says, Welcome. He said, just got one question for you. Who is God? Oh, it's not all about God. He said, I've been reading the Torah my whole life. He said, what happens is that God created the world in Florida in six days, rest on the seventh day, Adam and Eve came along, then, of course, the chosen people were the Israelites. And then they were held captive in Egypt for 247 years. Then Moses deliver came along, Moses took him out back to the promised land. And they had a lot of profits in the meantime. And he went through this whole thing of the first five books written by Moses and the new or the Old Testament and talk for an hour. Guy says, Man, you know a lot about God. I've studied my whole life. It shows you welcome to this door right here, Sam door, the Christian goes through the door. The drunk comes in, walks over looks at the man sitting behind the desk, falls to his knees and says, My Lord my God. There's a difference between knowing about God and knowing God. And I think they told me a long time ago, if you want to get to know God, gift nose kits. You know, that's where the 12 step program comes in. Religion does a one and it's important. Learning about God is important to learning that learning that stuff, I'm not downplaying that. But there's a big difference. Religion does a great job of teaching about God. Spirituality is getting to know God. And if you don't know him, you're not going to make it. And the way we we the way we do it in Narcotics Anonymous, so you get nice kids by doing by being of service to them. Not only 12 Step work, where you're going out talking to the wet drunk, but you do a great service, then, let's give him around. He does a wonderful job. I get I get emails from all around the world from like New Zealand. I've never been in New Zealand. You know, there are on his podcast. You know, the lessons too?
John M 23:24
I bet they're watching you right now. And Huzi I actually
Reno John A 23:29
I take an airline ticket to New Zealand on a kid tryna but I think you're, you know, being of service to our fellow man is how you're going to get to know God. You know, the greatest. I'm sure. That's, that's, that's my explanation. Spirituality is getting to know God. Religion is learning about God.
John M 23:55
So you have been sober for 40 years now. Right? 40 years. That's fantastic. What sort of changes have you seen in Alcoholics Anonymous over that? 40 years?
Reno John A 24:14
There's been, there's been a lot. Well, I'll tell you what, the most fascinating thing I remember when I came in as an 81. And I was brand new, I'm going to my main stag meeting. And the very first meeting they were having a thing they're getting back, they can survey and on a question they had. They'll get it to the GSR take back to New York, sir, report back. And they want to know this was the question back then. 1981. Should we put out a pamphlet for the gay alcoholic? That was the question that and this was a this was a debate like COVID to shut down and keep open. I mean, never. Well, why don't we just have a pamphlet for redheaded people then? Yeah, we're gonna watch them tonight. Gay Guy straight guy. This is what about a redheaded guy? That's a good time for redheaded guy. What about left handed guy? They were angry. They they only put out a pamphlet for them. They're alcoholic. We don't need a pamphlet for gay guys. Now we have a pamphlet for gay guys. You know. And I think that probably the biggest difference has become the age of people coming in. It used to be that the average age when the guy came into a was 4840. And so an old timer would have 20 years. He's sick. He's always 60 years old. He's got 20 years. And today, so there's a big debate over long timers, and old timers. And we have guys Casey's here, Casey got sober. He was 17. And, and he's been sober 30 over 30 years. Come on, he's, you know, like 48. But he's got 30 years old. He's a long time. You know, so the big debate goes after, you know, we got to change change our turn of longtown and old time, I'm an old timer. 70. And, but I feel like a long timer. But my sponsor told me said I tell you how that here's how you know whether you're an old timer or alarm timer, because we a lot, a lot of long timers coming in now the people under 17 and 18 years old. And the difference is this if it's Saturday night, and you're getting ready for bed about the same time you used to be getting ready to go out. You're an old timer. And if Sunday morning you're getting up about the same time used to be getting in. You're an OTA but the biggest telltale sign is this if your drug of choice is Viagra you're an old timer. But that's the biggest change I see. Because things come and go and they told me a self cleaning. And so you know, we get a lot of stuff coming in and out a but if we stay true to the the traditions and the principles are collecting on mistakes, it'll be self cleaning, and they'll come and go and but the age difference is remarkable. I mean, it is incredible. I couldn't get into a halfway house because I was under I was 30 when I came in. And I got the halfway house said now he said we get paid by the state for our success rate. And nobody stays sober under 40. So you can't come in this all change today.
John M 27:36
Tell me that we were talking one time and you mentioned that you were on a committee that was going to select speakers here in Texas. And you had a little bit of a difference of opinion about how to go about that. Do you remember what I'm talking about?
Reno John A 27:57
No. No, I think I think what you're saying that I do, I do recall that. Here's what happened was
John M 28:05
Leave me out the dry.
Reno John A 28:08
Here's what happened was we during the pandemic I was going to primary purpose of Arlington was my home group. Pandemic hit our campers got every group went through it. And so our group got divided. And we ended up splitting up and I said we started
John M 28:28
talking about it. No, you were you were on it was a it was there's a convention. Oh man. Oh, yeah. From long time ago.
Reno John A 28:40
Okay, at at Lone Star Roundup. Yes. Yeah. Okay. You should have said that, though. Sorry. isn't like the questioners probably that roaster roundup for those of you that are new, that was a great convention, Dallas, Texas. I mean, it was fun. It was fun. You get to see people hadn't seen for a year, you know, and there'd be 4000 people at the end of it. There were 4000 people. And I started out as an usher. I was new sober, and my sponsor got me to enter as an usher. That time we had about 800 people attending the media, so a big conference, then, then it kept growing and growing bigger and bigger, and I was Asher Asher. And then they invited me because I had her. I was doing a lot of traveling and speaking and so they said, Why don't you be on our selection committee to select speakers? I said, Okay, I'll do that. And so our first meeting now keep in mind, they had lost around a pad A every year, they would take one person who was the chairperson that year had been chairperson, and they'd move him to the committee and back of the committee that really ran the committees and as a lifetime position. And they, they didn't take they were very traditional. They said, No, we can't A meeting that break the traditions for no taping of the committee, you know, no taping of the meeting. So we had all these great speakers come in and talk and they never made a tape of another speaker. And so I'm there I'm on. And the first meeting, we had to pick speakers for next year's round up. There were six of us in there, and the chairman of the committee was a good friend of mine. And he's passed out all these tapes, which got like five tapes. He's not take these tapes home and listen to them. And then bring your favorite one back, or your favorite to back. And then we'll take those two, and we'll pass them around and come up with some speakers. I said, Ron Wayne, great, man. You are asking us to listen to these tapes. To decide who we're gonna have speak at the convention. Yeah. And yet we don't allow tapers to tape. Let me have a problem with that. And he's the last way we're gonna do it. And so then he called me up on Wednesday, and said, the committee's You said you'd probably be better served as an usher.
John M 31:14
We had a lot
31:16
of questions coming in from Facebook.
Reno John A 31:20
We don't have time.
31:23
Great. Okay. First from Anna Marie. She did not say where she's from. Her question is did you ever relapse? And what do you say to the alcoholic who has relapsed?
Reno John A 31:36
Okay, I never relapsed. That's a gift. But I never. And I tell you what, it's a tough pill. To do that in an AP program. That's a hard way to get sober. You know, and we always say, keep coming back. And there may come a time when you don't come back. You know, we sometimes we say it's okay to relapse, we get that impression because we, we say don't worry about it, come just come back. And that's all true. But you know, you gotta you gotta not drink. I don't care if you're asked falls off. They said, Pick it up, take it to a meeting. You don't drink, I don't care what happens. You don't drink and I was so afraid of drinking, that I did. Now, I will tell you this, I gained a great respect. For those that do slip by when I was trying to quit smoking. And malvehy make this real quick. Because I know your phone that I had. I was going to Trinity group just be a great group down off of just on the south side of LBJ and Inwood. And a six o'clock me it was a great meeting at Trinity group. And I was down there as the six o'clock meeting, I'd go there after work and I was pouring a cup of coffee and lamb was there. Len was an old timer this back in the 80s and hilum had 40 years back then. And then the topic was the 11th step. And so I'm sitting there sitting on my table smoking a cigarette, love to smoke. And LEM said he had watched his whole 11 step is I don't watch my whole Hungry, Angry, Lonely or Tired. And if I have if I'm not into those, I have a better meditation. And I thought I'll bet you if I didn't smoke, I'd have a better lemon step. I don't know where that came from. But that that was what hit me. So I put on my cigarette. And I'm going to go the rest meeting not smoke. Now that was the surge cigarette smoking was 630. So I'm I love to smoke, and I suppose after cigarette and didn't smoke, didn't tell anybody I was going to quit. I wouldn't get it. I just don't like going to smoke today. Went home prayed not to have that compulsion I carried with me for a week. My wife finally said you're not smoking. You quit smoking. Is it now? I'm just not. She's a dog. Don't tell me you quit. So we cleared him back down at Trinity group. And I'm pouring a cup of coffee before the meeting starts. And and Bob Hayes. You know the bullet Bob, fast man on earth played for the Cowboys. He's 10 that mean he's dead and I saw you use his name. But he came up and a lot of bum a cigarette. So I gave him the pack. He's not just want to take the pack. I got one in the car. So I gave my last pack of cigarettes and then smoking. It was the easiest thing in the world I'd done. I didn't have any compulsion. Didn't have any desire, no withdrawal. It was very, very easy. Kevin, my friend Kevin by talking about the diet of the metal every year sober. He has a sinner was a freak on physic on his physique. He worked out a lot. And he was very good at watching his diet and everything. But every six weeks, he'd go down to Mexico. And we went to Mexico. He would smoke. He did everything but drink alcohol. He would chase women he was small. He would eat all the junk he wanted to and then he would come home and not smoke. So how do you do that? How do you protect yourself? If not smoke, I just set them on the dresser drawer. When I leave the hotel and walk out, I'm done. As luck would have it, 57 days out a cigarette, I'm in Mexico. And I thought to myself, I'm laying on the beach with my wife or that I've been smoking Mexico. And so I went to have a high season in the room, she still smoked, and I stole a couple of cigarettes out of her out of her pack and burn them real quick. And that thing, went back down. We got ready to leave, and I went home, I thought well done. At work, I can smoke in Mexico. And a couple of days later, I'm in the office working on a case and a guy smoking I bummed a cigarette for him, then it became a closet smoker. And it was just horrible. You know, and I finally came out of the closet. And smoke I just got a closet literally go in the closet and smoke. And she couldn't tell she was a smoker. And it took me 14 years to quit. I tried everything under the sun to quit and I could not quit. And I think what happens is God gives you a reprieve.
Reno John A 36:08
And as you turn your back on that reprieve, man, it's hard. So you slipped on slide and I understand I think you got a reprieve and you and you slip. And now it comes work. You're gonna have to, you're gonna have to do something that did not drink. You know. And I think that's what happens to those coming in and going out. It's it's a, it's a hard deal, and I feel bad for him. I'm glad it happened to me because it took me 14 years after I quit smoking to quit smoking. almost 20 years sober when I quit smoking.
36:39
Okay, we have a few other questions coming in, would you like to know? Okay, next we have Jamie asking what is the most important thing the newcomer should know?
Reno John A 36:50
Don't drink. You know, a works a lot better if you don't drink. It not real good. If you're drinking, trying to rock the 12 steps, nothing worse than a head full of A and A bullet fill belly full of beer. You know, the most important thing is to don't drink. And how you do that is what is what's going to be tough. Because you're going to have to, you're gonna have to get your sponsor and you have to stay in touch get in the middle of get in the middle of a most I think the most important thing you can do is, is get in touch with a sponsor and follow what they tell you to do. You know? Okay,
37:28
James is asking, I'm curious about what John's experiences was step 10.
Reno John A 37:34
Was it step one? Step 10. Yes, step 10. And what's the question about step 10?
37:39
Just your experience with my experience?
Reno John A 37:41
I spent one whole hour doing the steps on step 10. How much time do we have?
John M 37:48
We have an hour when we get to
Reno John A 37:51
step two, I think somehow what happens is, this happens every day. I know, everybody I know, sometime between five years and 10 years, I think what happens is, you become the ash you really are. And I think that, you know, we come into AA and we're real active, you know, we're going to meetings, we're writing inventories, we're keeping a journal or Connor sponsor, we're chairing meetings, and all activity we're way up here, you know, and, and the diseases down here. And we have a big gap between all that activity that we're doing to stay sober and the disease, and we're pretty safe. And then a couple years go by, and all of a sudden, you know, you get a job and I catch that meeting. And then you get a relationship gone. And then you know what I'm supposed to fit back into society. I suppose learn how to learn how to live in society. So I don't need to go to meeting every dabbing one or two meetings a day. I can go to three meetings. I go Monday, Wednesday, Friday, go to me, I'm in Sunday, maybe. And so we start cutting back on our means a little bit. And then I don't need to call my sponsor would have worked the steps. You know, I'll call him I got a problem. And so what happens is the disease is progressive, even though we're not Greek, and it's progressing. That's why people with long term sobriety when they go out and die real quick. Because they don't start where they left off. They start 20 years later, wherever they, how long have they been sober? And so what happens is the disease is progressing. And here's our program and we're cutting back. And the diseases growing at some point in time, and usually somewhere between five and 10 years. The disease catches us and we wake up and more pain than we ever been possible. Yeah. And I think what happens is then we start to think, well, I've worked the steps. You know, I've sponsored people. I've done this and that there's got to be something else as we go to alternative therapies to relieve the pain. see that a lot with with guy though, start doing some, some counseling. I'm not opposed to that. But I think that what happens is, is you got to get back to basics that's never HomeGroup it's back to basics. Start doing, doing what you did when you first came in, you know. And step 10 is, when we take step 10, you review the first nine steps. Okay? What happens is continue take personal inventory, well, before you take a personal inventory, you got to take steps one, two and three, right? Then you take a personal inventory, which is step four, when you're done, you got to tell somebody about it, which is Step five, you got to change that behavior, and six and seven, so that you can when wrong promptly admitted, you make amends when wrong, promptly admitted. So you take step 10, you have effectively ridden the first nine steps. So you don't get too far off the beam. In one day, you don't get too far off the beam in a week. They'll go a year without doing that review. And you're, you're way off the beat. You know, and I think step 10 is what keeps us on track. And it keeps us doing what we're doing. If I if I every time I got in trouble. I've called my sponsor, and met with him. And read his point was when I was eight years sober, and I was in a ton of pain. I met with him on everything. He shake your head. He does the same thing every time and I hate it when he does this. I hate it windows. No, I know Jim. He always looks at me and he shakes his head and he says I got no magic. I hate that. Because I want magic. I want him to give me the magic word that's gonna take that pain away, you know? And make it okay. So that I don't, I don't feel that way. And, and going through that pain. Now here's what I learned by that. I learned what acceptance is all about. Say physical damage. Five. If I break my leg physical damage is pretty easy for the doctor to examine, diagnose, and treat. And they can tell you how long it will be for your leg man's. It's going to be six, eight weeks, whatever. Time is going to be for the lignans. You're in the hospital. And you come in to see me What are you gonna say you can say, Hey, slow down, take it easy. You need something, let us know we'll get it for you. And the doctors, they give you some pain medication, take away the pain. They could give you enough take away all the pain. They never do that.
Reno John A 42:39
They don't do that. Because they don't want you to forget you got a broken leg and get up and re injure yourself. So they give you enough pain medicine to take away to make the pain bearable. So you don't get up and re injure yourself. And I think emotional spiritual and psychological pain is much tougher to diagnose. And much tougher to no one is going to be over. You know what I got to do to get through this? Yeah, we see a guy come in to aid his manager. His wife left in his last his house had his car repossessed and they fired him at work. And we say hey, except you know you have to accept the fact that where you are right now get on guard your life grow up. You know grew up put your boots on get get busy working. You know. I used to think that acceptance if I accepted something that it wouldn't the pain would go away. Now I got divorced, that math accept that divorce, then I'll be okay. You know, the pain they won't hurt or hurt anymore. I am totally convinced See, God could take away all the pain if he wanted to. He never does that. Like the doctor never does that. He don't want you to forget where you came from. And the pain is there for a reason. Acceptance doesn't change the way you feel. It changes the way you act. That's what happens when you accept something. When Doctor when he got sober. What happened? Did you still have a desire to drink? Some of us did. Dr. Bob had a desire for two years to drink. But it changes the way we act. Our actions change and eventually our feelings will change. So we change our actions, not our foods. So I accepted that divorce. Then you can stop those. You know those drive by location checks? Yeah. Just drive by to make sure they're home on Friday night. But remember, that's tough on cars used to make before caller ID call them on the phone right Friday night. So if they're home, they pick up the phone hang up. Wait a minute. Wait, what's she doing home Friday night? I gotta drive back. See what strange trains cars in the parking lot. So if you accept that, then you can quit that activity. You can change your activity and eventually you Well, you know, and I had, I was going through that divorce and I was at a Christmas party and I was Harry knows Harry came drugged me on my house. Because I was isolated I was hired him in the house, but I went to this birthday party Christmas party, and a guy used to do the steps. He's passed on now to his name, but he's a good friend was a good friend. And I was time it was at his house, big house, North Dallas. And he said, How long are you guys married? I said, seven years. He said, it's gonna take you three years to get through that. I said, three years. Yeah, three years, three years get over that over that marriage. Next day, I talked to my sponsor, I said, Hey, he told me he had taken me three years to get through that divorce girl that divorce. And pocket shook his head. He says, John, He said, Let me I got a lot of confidence in you. I believe if you work hard that you can stretch that out to five years. And then he said, Why would you limit God's ability to make you well, it's activity you're going to change, they'll change the way you feel. And so I think acceptance and step 10, I learned a lot about pain in step 10. Because you have to change a lot of activity while you're doing because I tell you what, the disease will catch you in this program. And you're gonna wake up in a lot of pain, and you're gonna have to go through that process of accepting what's what's going on. And getting back to the basics. So three questions out of the way.
John M 46:24
Are there any more sir?
46:26
Yes, Lorraine. Lorraine is asking what do you think makes a good sponsor?
Reno John A 46:34
someone that loves you enough to tell you the truth, is not afraid to hurt your feelings, and has worked the steps and tries to get you and doesn't and helps you work the steps. We're not financial counselors. We're not marriage counselors. We only help people work the steps. And when I get outside of that realm, I get in all kinds of trouble. All kinds of trouble. And I I've messed up a lot on that. I had a guy had a guy our sponsor, that
Reno John A 47:17
he had a lot of problems. And good looking guy. I mean, here's a model guy. He looked at he go, Hey, you could have been on on covers of magazines, handsome, handsome guy. 100 days beautiful girl. And he was weird. The guy was sick. And I'll tell you about his fifth step. I listen to his fifth step and it was sick. And he told me, we were talking and his girlfriend had had dropped him because he hit her broker eardrum. And she came back and I said, don't. And I got outside my bounce. I was wrong. I said, I said, give her a break. Let her go. Don't take her back. I said she's sick as you are. You're sick and she's sicker than you because she came back to you. You're not a healthy woman after stay with you. You hidden like that. So if we say we get to be like, boiling frogs. You know how you boil frogs. You put a frog in a boiling water jumps out real quick. Reflex too fast. can't cook the frog that way. You got to put him in a pool of boiling of cool water is cool. Frog likes it. He swims around. likes it. You turn the heat up. You're so hot in there. Frog says get hot. But it's not that bad. For a little more, it's a little hotter. Frogs is getting really hot in here. But it's not that bad. pursues the water's boiling and can't get out. And that's what happens to a lot of us. That's how alcoholism works. If my last drunk What if my first drunk would have been like my last drunk out of quit. But when that bad, you know, and we get into relationships the same way whether it be spousal abuse, whether it be a man or woman, it ain't that bad. You know? And I told her, I said, let her go to her break. She can't leave you. She's as sick as you are, if not sicker. He told her that. And I was wrong. I had to make amends to him. I had no business getting involved in that. But so make sure they stay to the program and don't go outside the program. And that's what makes a good sponsor. Some of it loves you to stand on your toes and tell you the truth. But stay in the program. Don't don't go out there beyond to be a financial counselor or a marriage counselor or emotional counselor. No. Okay.
49:52
Now Mandy is asking do you speak to young adults and teenagers about alcoholism? Any advice there?
Reno John A 50:00
Yeah. I think that, as I said earlier that the young people are coming in at an alarming rate, and that's good. And a lot of they say is because of drugs, drugs get there quicker, you know. And, and so I think that with young people coming in, I think that the diseases the diseases, the disease, and it's like me sponsor I sponsored it. Years ago, I I sponsored a transvestite. And I thought about that, I said, How do I write this guy? You know, I don't, but it was fine. You know, because I stated the, the solution of the disease. And I think when you're working with young people, they got a lot of things I first guy sponsored the stay sober. His name was Wally, while he was 20 years sober when he came in. And he's still sober today. He lives out in San Diego. And his fifth step was the most boring thing I've ever heard in my life. Yeah, nothing, no action is broken windows a school. Okay. I want some juicy stuff, nothing there, you know, but we stay to the program of what you do in the program. And if you do that, that matter how old they are, the diseases, the diseases, the disease. And there are a lot of meetings out there now that are catered to young people. Whiskey, and milk is a great meeting I hear. So there's a lot of things you can do. But I think that we've got to welcome the young people in, they don't have to go through what we've gone through. And there's a lot of people that like Casey that's here that got sober when they were 17 that have got a lot of time sober now. And help them.
51:41
Okay, great. When one more from Facebook, Dan G from San Jose is asking, Can you please share your experience of how you work step 11. In your daily life?
Reno John A 51:53
I think that step 11. I got to share this this is this a funny story. When I was when I was married to Lisa, and these women are over talking at the house, and this one gal, okay her name. Because she's still sober today. She got a lot time sober. And we're all young back then. And she said, You know, I go to the step speaker meetings and these guys in the steps speakers are talking about how at night before they go to bed, they do this and this and this and then the morning, they get up they do this and this. So I want to tell you something is the baffles guys, none of them do that.
Reno John A 52:34
I can't wait till I get to be an old timer and share that. So every time I seriously, you're not you're gonna share that. No, I'm not sharing that ever. And you better not either. So I, I share it. But I'll tell you who said signing step 11 is I want to make this brief. Step 11 is very, very key to get in no God. And I think for me to clear my mind, I can't do that. I have to give my man something to think about. And the purpose of that step is to enable you to increase your conscious contact with your higher power. So when I first started, I used to think about how I got here. And I'd trade take it backwards to see how God worked my life. To get me to where I am today. You know, whatever that problem was like how to get to Dallas. What am I doing in Dallas, I know I'm in Dallas. I grew up at West. why that happened doubts. I traced that back. And I found out I started in Dallas 10 years before I got here. I didn't know that. You know, but there was a reason why I'm here. And when I came to Dallas for a very specific reason I came here because I have my sponsor here to help me work. My third step. I got married here, I got back in the insurance business here. My whole life fell together in Dallas, I'm supposed to be in Dallas. And I know that now. And that came through meditation by looking back of how I got here. I think you can do that with everything. How did I get married? Why didn't marry that guy? Say I have spiritual myopia. I'm near sighted spiritually, I have no idea how what is going on today is going to affect me 10 years from now. And I have no idea of what happened 10 years ago that affects me today. meditation helps them put that in perspective. And so I look at how I got here. And I still do that today. How I got to this and I find out that man God has been involved in our lives forever. And very small minute ways to get you to where you are today. And as your take that and that's the way I because I can't turn my mind. Let God move in there. You know, I have to give him a man some to think about and the purpose is to increase my conscious contact with my higher power. So I go back and say how to get to Dallas. I trace it back and I found out it's my sister got me here. And there's incredible experience. So I think to this day, I still do that. How did I get how did I get involved in in that business? How they get involved in that. And you trace trace it back in the car God got involved in your life years ago. years ago. That's how I that's how I meditate.
John M 55:04
Alright, so John, I want to ask you one last question. It's actually when asked you to share your experience, strength and hope regarding a particular we did an episode called expect a miracle. We talked about all kinds of miracles that you had experienced in your life. I'd like you to share about the experience that you had with your father, and when he was passing, when you were in the why, and that particular experience, and share that with the audience.
Reno John A 55:34
You know, what happened? Expect a miracle, saying a lot. And and I do, we depend on them. And the thing and we start talking about miracles, we usually only talk about one part of the miracle. And that's God's part. But there are two parts to every miracle. The best example of that is the children of Israel coming out of Egypt, right? They have been revered, held captive down in Egypt for 247 years. A lot of people didn't know that. I know that. So Moses is going to come on, take him back to the Promised Land, right? Y'all see that movie? I know you didn't read the book. So most came back to Egypt, they get stopped at the Red Sea. They're not a Crashers, who they're talking about, we're going to beta bad, they don't know how to crush Red Sea. And then God parts the Red Sea, right? And that's God's part of the miracle. That's only half part half the miracle. The children of Israel had to walk through the Red Sea. You're gonna walk through the Red Sea. If they don't walk through the red, someone didn't want to go. Somebody said, Oh, hell no, I'm not walking through there. And I'd rather go back to Egypt, let's ask moving come back. We don't have to be a slave. And walk through that, you know, in sobriety, you're gonna have to walk through your own Red Sea. If you don't do that. There's no miracle. You're gonna short cat, gods, because God, God can make you walk through the through the Red Sea. And you're all gonna have your own red pseudo walk through. And what he's talking about is is, I mean, I'm speaking at a convention in the life state convention. And I'm over there, and there's a great time. And Friday morning, I get a phone call. And my dad died. And so I went to the committee, and I said, my dad's passed away, and I gotta go home. And I said, can you spend the night? Well, I was gonna speak Saturday. They said, Well, have you speak tonight? To the Saturday night? I said, yeah. So I spoke Saturday night kind of playing. I smoke Friday night, kind of playing Saturday, and had to come a funny way. I had to fly from Hawaii to San Francisco. How to like an eight hour, five hour layover in San Francisco, flew down to Dallas had a three hour layover in Dallas, down to Houston had a tour layover in Houston, then back to Salt Lake. My dad lives in Salt Lake. Took me 24 hours to get there. And we burned my dad I got there, son, Sunday, Behrman, Dad Monday. And things were great. And I sent him to the airport Tuesday had to go back to Dallas and I'm at the airport. First time I'd been alone. Really first time I'd been alone. And I was tired. That was a rugged trip. I was hungry and I was angry. I started getting angry. What an anger to start with. But I started thinking about what was I doing in Hawaii. I should have been Hawaii, the good son would have been in Utah with his mom. My dad had heart attack two months prior to that. And the good son would have been in Hawaii been in Utah with his mom. I had no business being in Hawaii. This is just ego going to these conventions just ego stuff. I should have been with my mom that messed up our need. I call my dad had a heart attack two months prior to that and I caught him Tuesday for we laughed and they said yeah, he's doing better go ahead and go. But the good son would have been there shouldn't have been and it's just really started beating myself up sitting at the airport and thinking this is BS. I'm never gonna go to another conference. That's just ego I should have been with my dad when he died. And our kid in the middle of that my mind really started beat me up there came at Pedro's the intercom and that page said what a friend of Bill W pick up the white paging phone. I started laughing I think TVs he needs the 12 step call. So I pick up the phone this guy from Chicago we met down the coffee shop and his dad had died a year prior to that. And we had a great talk and and I said I've never heard of paid for Bill w at the airport and my life. So you paid a lot of build up friends of Bill w at the airport. He's never done before. Just want to see if any drunks in Utah
Reno John A 59:43
I never heard of a page like that before the airport. Yeah, it's just a coincidence in that getting into that. He's not gonna have that guy call put out a page. You know what that told me was I was right where I suppose my dad was gonna die. Anyway, we'd made a man's and things were fine. My brother was there. My sister was there as my mom I was not alone. I was where I was supposed to be talking to my kids by talking to God's kids, you know. And that was for me, because God's gonna put just the right person at just the right time with just the right information. Because God works through people don't forget that he works through people. And we got to pay attention to who's, who's calling. And we never know those things until after the fact. I never thought about that until a week later, when I was meditating, I had that happen. And I realized that what God had done, and all those miracles that happen in our lives on a daily basis, God's print just the right person, just read them just the right information. And it goes on and on and on all the time. And we just have to be aware of it and pay attention to what's what God's doing for us.
John M 1:00:49
So as we wrap up here, John, what do you want to leave the folks here with that are actually in the audience, the folks who are watching you on the Facebook live stream, and also the people that will be listening to you on the podcast eventually? What are some final thoughts you want to leave us with?
Reno John A 1:01:07
I make it real quick, the because the now the book talks about the spiritual toolbox, we have a spiritual toolbox of these tools. And I think that's very important to think about, it's a toolbox. Now, it's the only tool you have is a hammer. Every problem looks like a nail. Right? So we got to have this toolbox full of these tools. And the big book has one to fit each page of the big book is a different tool. The steps are a tool. Your sponsor is not a tool. Okay, your sponsor is the is the guy that's gonna tell you which tool to use your which Tillary, you don't know what the problem is, you know, your sponsor to tell you which tool to pick up until you get to have enough exposure, realize what but what you're doing. And I think probably, I've thought a lot about this, the difference between something that's complicated, complex, and simple. And they're all related. It's amazing. This came out of meditation. Best way to examine that is used to be years ago, young people notice the need to print maps on paper. And they would take these maps and put them in a book was called Map scope. And every outside salesperson had a book of maps, he got on the map, you go down the store, buy a map scope, and then then, and this was complicated stuff. Because you would have to fight the day before your appointment. The next day, you'd look up the appointment address, you go to the back of the page of the index, find that street, and it had numbers on it. The top of the page, the side of the page, you'd find those numbers and where they intersect was the where the street was. And this gets complicated now you got to look back and see okay, how do I get to that street she got crazy back is hard stuff. take you an hour to find an address this way, you know, it's complicated. Today, I have a cell phone very complex, very complex, I don't it's got 1000s that app, GPS has 1000s and 1000s of lines of code. It's very complex. I don't understand it. I don't even know what an algorithm is, you know, but it's very simple to use. You just have to pull it out, punch it and it hit you don't have to type in the address you've hit the microphone and speak the address and then it pulls it up and then you just have to follow directions it's that simple. You just have to follow the directions and you know alcoholics argue with GPS I do it all the time. But the house you got me on that way for that's insane. I don't need to do that. I'm gonna go this way. But see the GPS knows things. I don't know. They know that there's a traffic jam down there. They know that there's road construction, there's an accident. I just have to follow directions and that's the way the program works is very complex. That is very simple because I have to follow the directions I don't understand it. Why don't that random story What the hell is that all between me and God not you. I'm gonna tell you about what I got to do that I need to do that. I call my sponsor got a bigger problem in the morning by smashes Okay, before we get started do you make your bed but I got a problem yet I know you do. We'll get to it. Did you make your bed? No, no, not yet. Okay, make it common when you're done. Why? I do that? Make my bed comment. Okay, my beds made. Okay. One thing I forgot to ask you. I'm sorry. Have you vacuum? How long has it been since you have vacuum for a while vacuum come later. Okay, I'm ready. No, I'm sorry. Last time I saw you in your car your car look drunk. Okay? You're using the back seat is garbage. You want to clean that out. Wash your car vacuum and calm and when you're done. Why? Okay just chill out calm phonic. Okay, I'm done. Okay, let me mute the group. And we'll talk about it after the meeting. Go to the mean, fonts, one says, So what's going on?
Reno John A 1:05:25
Nothing. Why are you call me your next? Oh, yeah. I think about it back. There last quarter don't know what's going on. You don't need to know history to follow directions. If you do that you're asking to get a whole lot simpler.
John M 1:05:46
Everybody, Rena, thank you very much.
John M 1:05:58
Rino, John, if you are listening to this, thank you so much, so so much, once again for taking time out of your schedule. spending an evening with not only me, but all of the rest of the people on Zoom, not zoom. But Facebook live in all of the audience members that evening. I so much appreciate you. It was just absolutely fantastic. And once again, shout out to all the volunteers and all the church personnel that have helped put this thing on and also Mary Lim B and Tony D for their for the songs that they perform. They're just to add a wonderful vibe to the evening. I so, so much appreciate you all, everybody who had something to do with this one. And hopefully we'll do one of these things again here coming up in the near future. I have nothing planned at this time. It takes a little bit of work to put all that together but hopefully we'll be able to do something in the near future. Now on to a little bit of listener feedback and we have a treat here on the beginning of this from Murray tea. Hey, that kind of rhymes Edna Murray tea. left a voicemail here on the front is a here is Marie. He
1:07:24
John, this is Marie tea from Fort Myers, Florida. I just want you to know that I just heard Marty see. And I love the guy. I see him at PPG Austin as well. And I also want to thank you so much for the work you're doing in allowing me drunk like me to hear somebody as wonderful as Marty see, and the rest of the speakers that you have on here. What a service you're doing to the alcohol for the alcoholic. I'm just so damn excited. I can't stand myself. I love a love a and God it works. It works. It really does. And God is good and all those cliches and I'm like Marty, the more sober I am the more soap the more excited I get about this program. More and more. Anyway John, it was good to continue and see on the firing line.
John M 1:08:24
Murray thank you so much and I love that see you on the firing line I love that you mentioned Marty see yes I love Marty see as well. And gosh, what a what a privilege it is to have guys like Marty see and Reno John and Rachel who were talking about earlier all these people to be on the podcast and I just feel so blessed and you know Marie, I'm like you i I've been sober a little bit for a little while and I also am excited I think I'm more excited about it now than I was in the beginning and I don't mean well let me put it this way when I first got sober Am I more excited? I'm just excited in a different way it's kind of more of a cuz I was pretty excited when I first got sober and you know for people who are listening to this who have not been in a for a while they're probably wondering what what is going on with these people? Have they drunk the Kool Aid and they just are living on some in some sort of alternative universe or something and that's not it right. And I think Murray would agree that you know, it's just it's so rewarding to come in and see newcomers get well is so rewarding to see what aa has provided me over the years. And and it's just something that you can't put in words like the books as it is an experience you must not miss and, and that's just my personal experience, right? I love it. There's probably I'm fact I know there are people who have come to Alcoholics Anonymous, and they don't see it in the same way. And that's okay. But that is the experience for me. And Marty, and Marie is scores of others. And I'm just I'm very grateful that that Alcoholics Anonymous says that I'm grateful that Alcoholics Anonymous has provided me a way of life. And it provided me a way out of that existence that I was living there for so so many years. So anyway, Marie, thank you so much for calling him. Kelly writes in and Kelly says, Thank you for these pod beans. And I'm assuming what Kelly me there is an app. In fact, it's our hosting service that we use is called pod bean. And you can use that as a player to listen to the podcast is much like you can use Apple podcast or any other player that you have. But anyway, she says thank you for these pot, pod beans. My sponsee is in jail, and it is really making a difference. They give tablets apparently in jail now. I just wanted to drop you a note from Godot, St. Louis, Missouri. Well, you know what we've had Emily on our show before and Emily is from St. Louis MO, as well. I wonder if you guys know each other. I know it's a big city. But nonetheless, that is really good news. Kelly. And you probably sent that in because I was asking on a previous episode, whether or what the protocol is, for folks who are incarcerated nowadays, do they get access to internet? And can they listen to the podcast? And can they listen other podcasts? And can they get the get? Can they get access to other resources besides mine that can help them that apparently they do. And so anyway, Kelly, thank you so much for writing in from St. Louis. Mo.
John M 1:12:13
Adrienne writes in, in Adrienne is from Germany says Hello, John M. I hope that everything is fine with you. And you had a nice winter holiday. Just a small question. He says, Are there any age groups from your area online in zoom? Oh, yeah, I forgot about that. He says I've never been in an American a meeting. And it will be an experience for me considering that A has its root in the United States of America. Thanks. And Best regards, Adrienne. So okay, and I'm going to read this next one here, because it's, it's very similar. Kristen Rhodes. And she says, Dear John, I listen to your podcasts all the time, and I enjoy it. I am living in Buenos Aires. And I was hoping that you could give me a zoom code and password for a step meeting in your area. I especially like the speakers from your area in Texas. I would really appreciate it or any information you could give me and not take up too much of your time. It's okay. Service in a Christian P from Buenos Aires. In fact, it says I think this is a telephone number here and then it says in quotes by yella como soce. And I'm sure I am bastardizing that it would be a i l a como soce S O S. So I don't know what that means. It could mean go pound sand, John. It's probably not go pound sand is frog is probably something really nice. But who does good it could be. But anyway, I wanted to address both of those particular
John M 1:14:11
emails, the one from Adrian, and then one from Kristen. So I don't live in the Zoom world very much, but I want but but I reached out to a good friend Sarah, our who attends my home group. She's absolutely wonderful. And sit in and I responded and copied Sarah for both of you. And Sarah is much more versed in the Zoom world than I am now. Here's another subject. And Sarah would reply back and thank you so much Sarah, for your service work and getting with Adrienne and Kristen and guiding them in the right direction. But here's what I here's what I would say. Probably the best way to go about I know that there's tons of zoom meetings right? And I know some of you Do you want to go to a zoom meetings that are like in my area but yeah I don't really know if it really matters if in the Texas area there they are there. Oh, I just thought about something Charlie P has a Wednesday night Zoom meeting that he does every Wednesday night without with every Wednesday night with uh, with the primary purpose group. And I should get back to you guys with that but nonetheless, I'm thinking on the fly here but here's another way you can go about that little request. If you're in the super secret Facebook group and if you're not by the way, just go to Facebook find search for sober speak secret group and ask for admission you own and we will get you on in there. And if you're in there, you can post this question in there. I can guarantee you there are tons of people in there know a lot more about Zune than I do and they can help you as well. So hopefully that answer your question between me and Sarah are and going into the Facebook group and put your question in there. Hopefully you find what you're looking for. And lastly but not leastly. Kim D writes in and she says Hi John. I live in Denton Denton by the way is just down the street from me it's a it's within a shouting distance if you will. She's all lived in Denton and I just celebrated five years in December my home group is the Show Me group in Denton. I've never been there I don't think to the show my group I've heard of it. A lot of people I know a 10 there. I did go to a group in Denton for a while Kim D and I Kinder is on the very north side of Denton. I think they've moved facilities and the gentleman that I used to love there his name was OSI his OC OC ie some of you may know him he's gone to the big meeting in the sky now but nonetheless she says my favorite speakers are Jennifer HK and Charlie P and I look forward to hearing from cart Katie P soon thanks to the ad in the Facebook group where you are Quite welcome Miss Kim D and yes we will be having Katie P very soon I got her in the queue just got to get the episodes release edited, released all that kind of good stuff. And anyway, that's it. Thanks for writing in qmD. At does is another week. Oh no. Masa mana of sober speak on this year episode number two to two dose dose dose. We take this one week at a time everybody. Hopefully I'll be back next week. God bless you all. Keep coming back at works if you work at and have a good rest of your week. Adios